I would like to share a spiritual experience with you that not only was very personal to me, but I believe it has value to every person’s life. I would pray that the precious Holy Spirit would touch you, and show you how it may apply to your life as well.
This occured in a devastating moment of my life. My husband was into some really terrible things that had destroyed our marriage, and we had just told our two children that we were getting a divorce. If you have been through this experience, you’ll relate to the place and pain I was in.
After the kids had been settled and got busy, I had time alone in my room. I was praying and crying, and I felt Jesus’s hand on my head, stroking my hair and comforting me.
Soon, I literally saw a vision of heaven, at first it was the Lord and I walking through beautiful green fields, then I saw a lion eating grass. I love animals and this hit me as being profoundly strange. Soon a lamb went up to the lion and they began playing together. I knew then what I was seeing wasn’t earthly, but heavenly.
We then approached a city, where there was a lot of activity, but I wasn’t shown what they were doing, (heaven isn’t boring!) they moved in love and with a sense of purpose, but it was a joyful, light thing. Not a stressed out busyness that’s common to us. I saw some people dressed in white robes, but were rather plain, I then saw others also in white robes, but they were magnificent, obviously held in high regard and honor.
I questioned the Lord about the differences between the two groups of people. He then showed me the plain, first group and what their lives on earth were like, they had sorrow, pain and hardship, and they worked VERY hard at fixing their lives. The Lord asked me what I saw. “I see people in pain working so desperately to fix their lives”. Exactly He said.
Then He showed me the second group of people, the dazzling group, and their lives on earth also, and I saw the same circumstances in their lives (some worse in fact), pain, suffering and hardship, but I saw them down on their knees crying out to God for help. They gave their lives over to Him, placing their circumstances in His hands and trusting Him to move for them.
He then showed me their “after” appearance and then asked me what I saw. “Wow, I see God in their lives.” Exactly He said. He showed me both groups were equally loved, both groups were equally in hardship, but the difference it made in eternity was HOW we responded here on earth to those hardships.
He then told me, “I’m going to introduce you to My Father, you need Him now.” At that moment I tried to tell Him no, because all of the sudden I felt great fear.
I had NO idea I had a fear of facing The Heavenly Father, until it was presented to me. But it all unveiled so quickly, I really didn’t have much time to protest. Jesus sat down at the Father’s side, and it was like a veil or curtain was pulled aside, and there I was, face to face with The Father!
You know how when you are shocked, sometimes the oddest things fly out of your mouth? Your brain is totally by-passed? That’s what happened, the first words out of my mouth were “Oh, You’re kind!” “I was afraid of You.” He chuckled and told me that most people are too. I knew that if ANYONE got even one, fast glimpse of His face, they would fall instantly in love! It would be impossible not to, He was so incredible.
I was aware that my heart was exploding with love for Him, and I had a strong desire to give Him something special. I started looking around to see what was around me that I could give Him. I realized that not only was there nothing good I could present to Him, but to my horror the only thing I possessed was a sack of garbage in my hand. I felt bitterness and sadness wash over me, that was all I had. I had no gift to bring.
He immediately knew I was feeling this and told me, “Valerie, I LOVE garbage.” I was again stunned! “How could this be Lord?” He told me to remember the previous groups of 2 people I had met earlier, and said that He can take the garbage in our lives, and change it into something beautiful. That each component made a unique masterpiece, each life totally different, but all to His glory.
He then giggled, and His eyes lit up (yes, really) and acted almost like a child about ready to open a birthday present, and invited me to bring Him my sack of garbage, that we could go through each piece together, one by one, and I could tell Him the story of my garbage. I felt we had all the time in the world, there was no hurry, or people banging on the door wanting their turn with Him. It wasn’t like a Santa Claus line like I always had imagined, having to wait and wait to get a chance to be alone with God.
I then approached Him and together we looked into my garbage sack. The first item I pulled out was a rotten sock, it was dirty and had so many holes in it, it was barely recognizable as even being a sock. I told Him this one was my favorite. It represented my husband. He stretched out His hand, and I placed the sock in His hand and He said it was His favorite too.
The next in the bag was my wedding ring, it was broken and smashed. I told Him it was my marriage. I put the broken pieces of the ring in His hand.
The 3rd item I pulled out a heart (mine), it was bloody, mangled, bruised and broken. He knew it was my heart too, and he carefully took my heart into His hands and told me, “I’m really good at fixing those.”
The fourth item was a bitter root. I told Him that was my sin and I was sorry for my bitterness and that it was ugly. I placed that into His hand too, He thanked me for giving that to Him and smiled.
I thought at this point my bag was empty, when all of the sudden a horrific smell came out from the bag. I looked around inside, and found in a hidden corner at the bottom a dead, rotting and decaying mouse. I grabbed it by its tail and pulled it out and was looking for a garbage can because I didn’t want to put this foul thing in His hand. He didn’t give me a choice here and wisked it out of my hand and said, “I’ll take care of that one.” It represented the enemy’s evil plans and schemes that had caused great damage in my life.
NOW, my sack was empty, but I didn’t know quite what to do with it. I knew if I carried around an empty sack, I would probably want to put those things back in there. He sensed my thoughts and suggested giving Him even the sack so I wouldn’t be tempted to take those things back. I told Him yes please, and if I asked for my garbage back, to please tell me no.
I felt loved and free, He even LIKED me! He then told me it was time to go back and to watch Him make a masterpiece out of this. He did warn me that masterpieces take time to build.
Ask the Holy Spirit to reveal if you have garbage in your life. Ask Him what is in your garbage sack and what it represents. I would encourage you to place those things in His mighty hand, and watch Him make a masterpiece in YOUR life.
As an update footnote: This happened to me several years ago, the Lord did deal with my husband, my husband ended up finding the great love of God, He did heal my broken heart, and He has healed our marriage. Our divorce was cancelled, all glory goes to God! Day by day His grace helps us.
